9 Experiences in Life Make You Resilient

There’s a stark difference between surviving life and truly living it.

That difference often comes down to emotional toughness. It’s not about hiding your feelings, but rather about managing them, even when life throws a curveball at you.

Emotional toughness is the shield you carry that allows you to push through difficult experiences without losing your balance. And if you’ve gone through these 9 life experiences, you’re likely emotionally tougher than most. 

Let’s dive in. 

1) You’ve faced serious adversity

Life isn’t a bed of roses for any of us. We all have our fair share of challenges and setbacks. But for some, the scale and intensity of these adversities are much higher.

Facing serious adversity in life isn’t something anyone would choose. However, it’s these very experiences that equip us with emotional resilience. They teach us to stay steady in the storm and to navigate life with grit and determination.

The journey through hardships is like walking through a fire. It might burn you, but it also forges you. And if you’ve walked through this fire, you have probably been shaped into an emotionally tough individual.

2) You’ve learned to embrace failure

In my life, failure has been a constant companion.

But here’s the thing: each failure was a lesson in disguise. I learned to take them in stride, not as a reflection of my worth, but as stepping stones towards success.

Embracing failure isn’t about enjoying it; it’s about understanding its purpose. It’s about knowing that every stumble is a chance to learn and grow.

If you’ve also managed to grasp this concept, like I have, then you’re definitely emotionally tougher than the average person.

3) You’ve mastered the art of self-soothing

We all have moments where we feel overwhelmed, anxious, or upset. It’s part of the human condition. But emotionally tough individuals have a secret weapon: they know how to self-soothe.

Self-soothing is about finding ways to calm yourself down when emotions run high. It can be as simple as taking a few deep breaths, going for a walk, or even just taking a moment to sit quietly.

Can you relate?

Good for you. It’s a sign that you’ve developed emotional resilience. It means you know how to navigate emotional turbulence and come out on the other side unscathed.

4) You’ve become comfortable with discomfort

Let’s face it, nobody likes to be uncomfortable. But life has a funny way of throwing us into situations that are, well, downright uncomfortable.

Perhaps it’s a tough conversation you need to have, a daunting task you’re avoiding, or a major life change that’s got you on edge. The truth is discomfort is part of life.

Emotionally tough people understand this. They don’t shy away from discomfort or try to avoid it. Instead, they lean into it. They recognize that discomfort is often a sign of growth.

5) You’ve learned to let go

Holding on to grudges, past mistakes, or painful memories can weigh us down. It can keep us stuck, unable to move forward. But emotionally tough individuals have learned the art of letting go.

Letting go is about accepting that you can’t change the past. It’s about releasing the grip that these negative experiences and feelings have on you, and allowing yourself the freedom to move forward.

It’s not easy, and it doesn’t mean forgetting or necessarily forgiving. Instead, it’s about no longer allowing these past experiences to dictate your present or future.

6) You’ve learned to value yourself

This is a big one.

In a world that constantly pushes us to compare ourselves with others, maintaining a strong sense of self-worth can be challenging. However, emotionally tough people have learned the importance of valuing themselves.

They understand that their worth isn’t defined by others’ opinions or by their achievements. Instead, they know their worth comes from within. It’s tied to their values, their character, and their ability to respect themselves.

Sound like you?

Well, you’ve likely achieved a level of emotional toughness that many struggle to reach.

7) You’ve loved deeply and lost

One hard truth about life is that the deepest emotional experiences often come from love and loss.

When you open your heart to someone, you expose yourself to the possibility of profound joy and deep sorrow. This vulnerability can be terrifying, but it can also be a powerful catalyst for emotional growth.

Losing someone you love, whether it’s a breakup, a fallout, or even death, is one of the hardest experiences life throws at us. It’s a heartache that sears and a sorrow that drowns.

But here’s the thing about love and loss – it teaches us about resilience. It shows us that we can endure immense pain and come out stronger on the other side.

Have you loved deeply and faced the pain of loss? If so, don’t underestimate your emotional toughness. The strength it takes to open your heart again, despite knowing the risks, is a testament to your emotional resilience.

8) You’ve maintained your optimism

I remember a time when everything in my life seemed to be going wrong. I was dealing with personal loss, professional setbacks, and health issues, all at once. It felt like I was in a tunnel with no end in sight.

But my guiding light was optimism. I believed that things would get better. Even when it felt naive or foolish, I chose to believe in the possibility of a brighter future.

Maintaining optimism during tough times isn’t about denying reality. It’s about choosing to focus on potential positive outcomes, even when they seem distant or unlikely.

If, like me, you’ve managed to hold on to your optimism even when life has tried its best to strip it away from you, then you’ve got an immense emotional strength.

9) You’ve continued to grow

The most telling sign of emotional toughness isn’t just surviving life’s challenges but learning and growing from them. It’s about using those experiences as fuel for personal growth.

Emotionally tough individuals don’t stagnate. They evolve. They learn from their mistakes, they adapt to new situations, and they continuously strive to become better versions of themselves.

This continuous growth is the cornerstone of emotional resilience. It reflects a mindset that refuses to be defeated and instead chooses to grow stronger with each challenge.

Final thoughts

The road to emotional toughness isn’t a straight path. It’s a journey filled with twists, turns, and occasional detours.

Each of the experiences we’ve discussed serves as unique milestones on this journey. They challenge us, shape us, and ultimately strengthen us emotionally.

But perhaps the most important thing to remember is that emotional toughness isn’t a destination. It’s not about reaching a specific point and declaring “I’ve arrived”.

Rather, it’s about the journey itself. It’s about continuously learning, growing, and adapting to life’s challenges. It’s about embracing our vulnerabilities and turning them into strengths.

So, as you reflect on your own journey, remember that every experience, every challenge, and every triumph is shaping you into an emotionally tougher person. Embrace this journey and the resilience it brings. 

Lucas Graham | June 12, 2024

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